So you want to know how to be confident but you don’t know where to start. Some people think confidence is like a lightbulb you can switch on, but its not. You have to gradually gain confidence if you want it to last! Its a healing process you need to establish and nurture so you can become your best self! Confidence is something we all struggle with, even myself! The bubbly outgoing go getter Abbi you know, was not always this extroverted! In fact at one point my confidence was at an all time low and I didn’t know how to pick myself up again! That was until I told myself I needed to make a change, and one by one I grew my confidence back! Today i’m going to tell you the exact 7 easy ways, i’ve become the best version of me.
How to be confident
7 easy ways to be confident
I’m not exactly “in shape”, but I went from never consistently going to the gym, to 3 times a week . The reason I started exercising was because I had lost confidence in the way I look. Sometimes when you leave a relationship your emotions can get the better of you, and you start to look at yourself differently. “Should I have looked a certain way?“. Honestly you can’t love other people unless you love yourself first. For me, being “skinny” has never been a desire of mine, as i’ve always been curvy and found this as an asset. Yet for some reason in my “slump” I lost confidence in knowing that my curves were not “desirable” anymore.
What did I do?
I took to the gym and started having more energy, started seeing my body change into something I’d never experienced, and basically became a toned version of my curvy self. This was when I realised how much I actually liked my body, knowing I had the power to control its outcome. Now although i’m not 100% happy yet, I have the confidence to know I can be, with a little more determination! All i’m saying here is exercising is not only good for your health physically, but also mentally. Sign up for you local gym, go for a walk, or if you like the cosy warmth of your own home, whip out youtube and get your living room workout on!
2.Change your closet
“I don’t want people to be disgusted when they look at me “.
Now i’m not saying completely eliminate all your clothes , but change how you wear them. In my “slump” I started wearing clothes that were a UK 18 when in fact I was borderline 14-16. I did this thinking “oh no I could never wear anything that printed out my fat rolls”, “I don’t want people to be disgusted when they look at me “. Yes I had a warped mind, people! I was ignorant at the time. I chose to wear my clothes baggy and loose fitting , and I was walking around looking like a washed up middle aged mom …. and I was 22.
To solve this problem ,
I simply tucked in my shirt, started wearing heels instead of granny slippers and actually put on makeup from time to time! No i’m not saying hiding behind makeup makes you confident, but makeup is a powerful tool that can actually boost your confidence! & wearing clothes that you probably wouldn’t wear will boost your confidence too!
What i’m trying to say here is STEP OUTSIDE YOUR COMFORT ZONE.
3. Learn something new
Getting involved in a new skill or hobby will for sure help with your confidence. The art of learning something new is invigorating and powerful. For me I dove deep into the blogging world and started a company, started organising events and networking. Although it wasn’t considered my “fun”, It allowed me to stay focused on working towards my career, and once I get that , i’ll be able to enjoy the good stuff! Why not join a tennis club , or a book club or any kind of club! Just get some new knowledge into your brain and you will feel like a different you!
4. Make yourself useful
Are you really good a something? Why not offer your services and help others. If you can do it in your sleep then why not make it easy for someone else? Another way to stay useful is to do simple housework , clean up , rearrange things. Time will fly by and you will still gain that sense of accomplishment, which will in turn show you how to be confident.
Train your mind to stay in the present!
ok I say to meditate but I legitimately don’t know how. I do however know that meditation requires deep focus, and the ability to shut out negative thoughts. As a descendant of a worrier parent, its easy for me to jump to ” what if’s, and this could happen”. So for all of you who don’t know how to meditate like myself , here is exactly what I do. I ask myself ” am i happy?“, ” if not what would make me happy?” ” what can I do right now to work towards this happiness?“. I then write my thoughts and ideas into a journal or notes on my phone. Then whenever i’m not feeling the best , I can look at my list and start working on it to keep myself active!
6. Read Something
This goes hand in hand with learning something new. Reading is a great mind stimulator, and by being educated we become more confident in our day to day lives. Reading will show you how to be confident at work, how to be confident at school or wherever you need to spark up an interesting conversation! It doesn’t even have to be a book, it could be a magazine or a newspaper or a BLOG (hint hint)
7. Don’t let anyone control your fate
You are the only person in control of your future. NEVER let anyone try to tell you what to do in life. Never let anyone tell you you are not good enough , or don’t look good enough or ARE NOT ENOUGH.
YOU ARE ENOUGH
You and only you alone have to power to achieve the things you want in life and its starts by being proactive! Confidence is something that you can build yourself and simply become the REAL you . Not the you someone else wants you to be . Once you find the real you , you will find true happiness.
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